Such a Happy Little Dumpster Fire
How to Survive, Laugh, and Maybe Save the Day
Prelude
Most people engage with politics from a deeply personal perspective—shaped by fear, hope, and the narratives they trust. While some may act with harmful intent, they are the exception, not the rule. In truth, the majority of us—across political divides—want the same basic things: safety, stability, dignity, and opportunity.
We’re not as divided as we’re led to believe. Voices profiting from division amplify our differences, creating the illusion of irreconcilable conflict and fueling fear. But at our core, we are neighbors, friends, and family. Even when faced with serious disagreements, we can find a way forward—one that doesn’t rely on manufactured rancor to keep us apart.
It’s time to reject the illusion of division. It’s time to recognize what most of us already know: together, we can build a future that serves us all—if we stand with each other, rather than against. Maybe it’s time we stopped waiting on politicians and started figuring it out ourselves.
Satire
2025 kicked off with a bang. And by bang, I mean a dumpster fire of epic proportions. Picture a fire so intense, even the flames are like, “You know what? I should’ve called in sick today.” But somehow, we, the resilient humans, kept a straight face, dodging layoffs like middle schoolers dodging dodgeballs.
Still, the dumpster fire just kept growing. Thousands were laid off, but many somehow remained both fired and not fired, as if we were playing a real-life game of Schrödinger’s Workforce—where you’re both employed and unemployed until further notice. Meanwhile, the Supreme Court is stepping in, debating whether to throw gasoline on the fire. They’re the friend who brings marshmallows to the party... and promptly sets everything ablaze. But we stay hopeful! With enough fracking, maybe we can fuel both our return to the office and keep the Supreme Court interesting.
In other news, vaccines for kids? Totally optional now. All major diseases have been eradicated—or maybe we just can’t vaccinate kids anymore? Who’s keeping track? No worries, though. We’ll have plenty of children—about 13 per man. No need to marry anyone—just gather your future basketball team and voilà, family values 2025 style! It’s like bringing the 1820s back, but with more awkwardly placed moral nostalgia.
As for work-life balance, we’re finally achieving it! No more stress about work, paychecks, or bills that never seem to get paid. Thanks to robots, we’ll soon be rolling out Schrödinger’s Workforce 2.0—robots who are both employed and unemployed, but still dirt cheap. Who’s hiring a robot? No worries! That Canadian airline's got it covered—they argue that robots are separate legal entities, eliminating the need for organizations to celebrate holidays or any kind of recognition to workers. Win-win! Only 262 million adults out of work, and it’s five o’clock somewhere! And for the social safety net? Well, it's a six-pack of beer - free!
Let’s not forget about the ones keeping everything together. They’ve mastered makeup, expertly avoiding the dreaded jawline foundation line. Priorities, folks. And now we’re celebrating with chainsaws—because nothing screams “I’ve got my life together” like wielding dangerous tools for fun. Safety net, you ask? Gone. Support for kids’ education or healthcare? Also gone. ACA, Obamacare—who’s even counting anymore? LGBTQ+, people of color, women, and immigrants? Don’t worry, we’ve made sure to protect them... from ever being protected. After all, we can’t let them slow us down! But hey, there’s a petition for free beer. Maybe that’ll work!
Meanwhile, nations are being invaded by our Schrödingeresque buddies, who are bold enough to blame the invaded nations for their own invasion. “Well, if they’d just folded and handed over their country, we wouldn’t be in this mess!” Schrödingeresque friends never let their true friends get invaded without at least blaming them. And now, we're trying to figure out how to submit receipts for all the land, minerals, and natural resources we’ve “won” through these strategic takeovers. Stopping world wars is expensive these days. Thankfully, AI is cost-effective, and indiscriminate water use is just genius. Guess what? Monopoly strategies work in real life! Who knew?
Also, goodbye to the dollar! Now we’re embracing Schrödinger’s cash—it’s cash, but you can’t spend it. Oh, and deportations are in full swing. Citizens, guests, visitors, criminals—who’s keeping track anymore? Native Americans, consider yourselves included. And the first lady (also an immigrant)? Gone. Maybe she’s off doing something mysterious, or maybe they deported her too. Top Google searches now revolve around cults, regime changes, and how to apply foundation like a VP.
As for the housing crisis? Solved! No one can afford a house anymore, but hey—IVF is now affordable! Someone should prioritize that. Who? We’re not sure, but someone definitely should. Oh, and let’s not even talk about eggs—unless you’re trying to afford one.
But let’s end on a bright note—snow! It’s here to save the day! Snow days keep kids out of school and parents out of work (many without pay!). And the real miracle? Schrödinger’s Workforce has figured out how to be both in the office and at home during snowstorms. Special government advisors, too. But, alas, even snow can’t put out a fire this big. So while we may not have a snowball’s chance in hell of extinguishing this dumpster fire, at least we’re all in this together—frozen, burned, employed, unemployed, sick, not sick, rich, broke, and all the rest… but with our makeup on point and a cold beer in one hand and a chainsaw in the other.
A Surreal Reality
This sounds surreal because it is. No one can navigate something this chaotic, but that’s also the point. Chaos forces you to watch and feel as if there’s something to navigate. But that’s the antithesis of critical thinking and rational choice. So, what does one do when this occurs? You stop and recognize chaos as a distraction from what matters.
And I say this to you, regardless of the party you support: After all this chaos, neither side has received anything of tangible benefit. Democrats are mourning the absence of federally supported DEI and social concerns. But no one from any party has seen a reduction in bills, an increase in benefits, or other promises made by those in power. One might say it’s too soon to see benefits, but how would a person seeking work benefit from removing DEI while increasing the number of those searching for jobs? Or from impacting the Department of Education when homeschooling requires someone to be home with children while bills and inflation are high? Immigration deportations might help job situations, but are those the jobs you want, and how will you compete with all those who lost their federal roles and need employment too? Where is the support for families when both Medicare and Medicaid are being cut, and those people are laid off as well? How will you benefit if SNAP or food access is cut off? Ask yourself: What have you gained from all this chaos? Brass tacks: how have you benefited, or will you benefit, from this?
You see, the great accomplishments aren’t truly that. Right now, it’s more retribution and showing that things are breakable. But it’s mainly an effort to be so dramatic that you scramble rather than think or plot a path for yourself. Rather than make choices or reach out to politicians from all parties. Rather than create a list of topics and issues that matter to us and remain focused on those, reducing the rest to noise. Rather than sever connections with big organizations that don’t support your priorities. Rather than going rogue and making it hard to pinpoint how to “hit you where it hurts.”
To go rogue means someone displays independence or fails to follow an expected script.
Losing Us to Politics
The first step in this 2025 dumpster fire is to get you to abandon yourself and your priorities.
Instead, we must see ourselves as independent from leadership and manipulation and having choices in this reality. We must remember our power, authority, and ability to think and plan critically.
It is also helpful to remember that those in power are mortals—mere men who put pants on one leg at a time. They are not monoliths; they can fail just like the rest of us. It is a great tragedy to believe they are more than that.
Like meets like. They want to go rogue—we can, too—but only if we understand that’s what’s needed. Radical autonomy is the answer to meeting this moment and finding a way to thrive in its energy.
Current Chaos Isn’t Just Happening—It’s Tactical
The constant churn of crises, contradictions, and absurdity feels overwhelming. But this isn't just random misfortune or bad governance—it's a deliberate strategy. Steve Bannon, former advisor to Donald Trump, famously said, "Flood the zone with sh*t." This is the essence of chaos creation: overwhelm the system, drown out reason, and flood the airwaves with noise and confusion. The goal? To disorient, disempower, and distract.
This is not just poor leadership; it’s a calculated move to keep us in a state of perpetual chaos. Instead of engaging with meaningful issues, we're constantly reacting to the next scandal or "crisis" that emerges. In this chaos, power consolidates in the hands of those who can control the narrative and manipulate information.
So, What’s the Game Plan When the World Feels Like an Out-of-Control Meme?
Here’s how we can reclaim control in a world that seems like a surreal sitcom:
1. Reconnect with Your Core Values
Action: Reflect on what truly matters to you—family, community, integrity. Write down these values and use them as a compass when you feel lost in the noise. Why it matters: In the chaos, grounding yourself in your values helps you make decisions that align with who you are, not what others tell you to care about.
2. Create a Personal "Noise Filter"
Action: Develop strategies to block out distractions—unfollow social media accounts, mute certain news sources, or set daily limits on time spent on chaotic platforms. Why it matters: The constant flood of opinions and information can overwhelm you. By filtering out the irrelevant, you regain focus on what truly matters.
3. Prioritize Family and Relationships
Action: Dedicate intentional time to nurturing relationships. Whether it's family dinners, reconnecting with old friends, or volunteering, invest in what matters most. Why it matters: The people you care about are the cornerstone of your life. Strengthening these bonds provides support and perspective when the world feels off-balance.
4. Limit Engagement in Political Drama
Action: Rather than getting swept up in political arguments or media spirals, focus on local, actionable change. Volunteer, advocate, or have more meaningful conversations. Why it matters: Political drama drains energy and divides communities. Channeling your efforts toward tangible local change produces more positive outcomes.
5. Develop a Radical Autonomy Practice
Action: Make choices that prioritize your well-being and values. Start small: say no to something that doesn't serve you, take a break, or leave toxic situations behind. Why it matters: Radical autonomy is about regaining control. It’s about making decisions that reflect your truth, no matter how chaotic the world gets.
6. Take Care of Your Mental and Physical Health
Action: Establish a self-care routine that includes exercise, mindfulness, and sufficient rest. Why it matters: A healthy mind and body are the foundation for navigating a chaotic world with clarity and strength.
7. Plan for the Future Without Losing the Present
Action: Balance planning for the future with living fully in the present. Set goals while ensuring space for today’s joys. Why it matters: In a chaotic world, it’s easy to get stuck between the present and the future. A balanced approach allows you to thrive today while still making progress toward tomorrow.
8. Embrace Imperfection and Flexibility
Action: Let go of perfectionism. Allow yourself to be flexible with plans, projects, and expectations. Why it matters: Chaos brings unexpected challenges. Flexibility helps you navigate them with ease and reduces unnecessary stress.
Countering Chaos with Radical Autonomy
Here’s the key: if we understand that the chaos is intentional, we can stop reacting to it. Reacting to every crisis, getting swept into every scandal, is exactly what they want. By embracing radical autonomy, we step outside the manufactured chaos. This isn’t about fixing every problem—they’ve already stacked the deck. It’s about choosing our responses, reclaiming our power, and deciding where we focus our energy.
Radical autonomy isn’t about avoiding problems—it’s about reclaiming our ability to act in ways that matter, independent of the distractions they throw at us. It’s about being aware of the narrative and choosing to live outside of it. When we do this, we build meaningful change from a place of clarity and purpose.
On a More Applied Ethics Note
Regardless of your political leanings, take action where it counts: contact your representatives. Call them (yes, actually call). Leave your zip code and explain your concerns. While emails can be ignored, phone calls are documented and shared directly with representatives.
For those aligned with red values, ask: Where are the tangible benefits for citizens? What happened to making things better for all, not just for political gains? Ask for your needs to be prioritized, and encourage collaboration across party lines to make real progress.
For those with blue values, ask: What actions will you take to advocate for those values? Speak about your struggles and push for collaboration with other representatives, regardless of affiliation.
For independents, ask them to align with your needs. Encourage them to find common ground with others to drive change, even if they can’t support every issue.
Focus on the solutions that truly matter, and don’t let the noise drown them out. And if you’re unsure about the truth of something, feel free to reach out to me. I’d be happy to help.
And while I joke about it, the dumpster fire requires more than just a cold beer and snowstorm to extinguish. But perhaps, with a bit of humor, humanity, and resolve, we can still make it through.
